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Here We Go Again

by Patrick Porter

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1.
THE BOOGA LASER BEAM (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I had a most delightful dream The frogs were red and the bog was green A Nissan buffed up to a sheen Eyelash smiles like Ben Vereen So exciting So enlightening So delighting me I saw a most distasteful thing Bill Murray performing in a toilet orgy scene So frightening So frightening So frightening Times three Then I woke up from a horrible dream
2.
San Antonio 00:55
SAN ANTONIO (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) It’s been a long day and I wish I was home It’s been a long day and I wish I was home All I have to show for it is a slim volume of poems All I have to show for it is too-big calzones I feel like I’m being followed around by drones I’m in San Antonio and I wish I was home WOO
3.
THE OTHER SIDE (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) All the best fighters have four eyes And speak in amped, bloodcurdling cries At all the liars who stand in line On the other side They do everything we don’t like They dot the I’s in Victimized They’re all wrong and that’s our right The other side So stand up and be counted Are you on Ours’ or the Other Side? So stand up and be counted We hate everyone on the other side The Other Side Fly a banner, raise a sign Misunderstood and much maligned We wanna do what we want all the time The Other Side We’re inclined to think alike And We’ve decided, so be advised That you are wrong, and that’s our right The Other Side So stand up and be counted Are you on Ours’ or the Other Side? So stand up and be counted We hate everyone on the other side The Other Side (Man co-existed with dinosaurs! Uh-oh, white woman calling the police! It’s not rocket surgery, ladies and gentlemen! Murder Patrol! Quack Quack Quack! Etc.)
4.
EVERYBODY’S LONELY (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) (Icicle!) Meatball Fellini up on the screen He always treats his sweet pea so horrible and mean She winds up crying on the side of a road Stylistically stripped of an area code Dead inside Dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Everybody winds up so dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Ain’t it sad to wind up so dead inside? Sitting across from the ALICO The only thing survived ’53 Waco 83 half-silent miles Every highway line’s 53 turnstiles Dead inside Dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Everybody winds up so dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Ain’t it sad to wind up so dead inside? I don’t want to have a child Better off to keep the picante mild A screaming baby in a Wal-Mart Tee Reminds me much too much of me Dead inside Dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Everybody winds up so dead inside Everybody’s lonely And we all eat Pasta-Roni Ain’t it sad to wind up so dead inside?
5.
Lumpfish 04:00
LUMPFISH (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) Give the patent to the merchant Give the merchant to the patent Stockfish Lumpfish Fresh lumpfish
6.
MIDDLEMOST LOT (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) Must be by my first eye I meet someone Must be by my first time I meet someone Then I’m putting you out in the middlemost lot Putting you down in just the right spot Sitting on the seat where the swing got swung Sitting on the sheet where the in went up Then I’m putting you out in the middlemost lot Putting you down in just the right spot Putting you down in your petticoat Face coming out of a face Face coming out of a phone Face coming out of the floor I move you around in the middlemost lot I move you around in just the right spot I move you around Swinging on the seat in your sweet home-spun Singing on the seed where your feet went up Then I’m putting you out in the middlemost lot Putting you out in just the right spot Seagull overseas where the sand swept up Standing on the breeze where the plip goes plup Then I’m putting you out in the middlemost lot Putting you out in just the right spot Putting you out in your petticoat Face coming out of a face Face coming out of a phone Face coming out of the floor I move you around in the middlemost lot I move you around in just the right spot I move you around Must be by my first eye I meet someone Must be by my first time I meet someone Then I’m putting you out in the middlemost lot Putting you down in just the right spot Putting you out in your little red towel
7.
MOKIE POKIE SWEETNESS PIE (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I remember when I saw her In the winter Texas PetSmart Behind the glass was Mokie Pokie Sweetness Pie Her owner was allergic And had just left her behind I was hers and she was mine My Pokie Sweetness Pie When I’m feeling down I look into her wonky eyes One of her eyes is blind from birth So her eyes are just like mine She’s plopping in her aerie And her paws are like blueberries I love my little Mokie Pokie Sweetness Pie I’m sitting ‘round with Mokie Reading dumbass Don Quixote She’s the knight and I’m the squire My Pokie Sweetness Pie She likes to eat cockroaches And the common housefly She sits on the PlayStation Pokie Sweetness Pie When I’m feeling sad I look into her wonky eyes One of her eyes is blind from birth So her eyes are just like mine Catnip in her aerie And she shows off her blueberries I love my little Mokie Pokie Sweetness Pie
8.
Stenerud 03:22
9.
ROOTIN’ FOR YA (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I’m rooting for ya to not get tired of me I know that there are other fish in the sea But I’m rooting for ya to not get tired of me (Baby, baby don’t you leave, etc.) Did no harm Like Jake from State Farm, America Laid in bed Like Right Said Fred, America I’m rooting for ya to keep being my wife The ring on my finger, I mean it for the rest of my life It would mean even more if you continue to be my wife (Baby, baby don’t you leave, etc.) Stacks of bills And Outback Grills, America Trump’s the Prez Permanent rez, America Do I come with the house? You’re the only person I like Your new red dresses are nice They’d be even nicer if you keep being my wife (Baby, baby don’t you leave, etc.) Wearing my mask Staying on task, America Inside Whirl Outside world America Do I come with the house?
10.
MARRIAGE ON THE ROXX (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) Marriage on the roxx Smell my dirty socks Trading tits for tots Snoring on the couch While you’re a morning grouch Will you still love me When I’m 43? Will you even still be with me? Marriage on the roxx Bears and Goldilocks Comparing cunts and cocks Have a marriage walk Have a marriage talk Write it out in chalk This ain’t my first time out to sea And you’re already a divorcée And will I be one at 43? I got a marriage on the roxx
11.
YOU AND YOUR MANGO PERFUME (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I see all these boxes around Who are they filled for? Who are they to? I sit down on the couch It starts to quiver Like a tractor What else do you want me to say? And how many times a day? How can I convince you That I think you Are pretty? You’re pretty (!) I know I can’t write Love songs like I used to But now love is more useful Then I see all these boxes around Filled with perfume Mailed to you What else do you want me to say? A thousand times a day And will I ever convince you That I think you Are pretty? You’re pretty You’re pretty You’re pretty (!)
12.
DOWN TO DEKALB (WAITS’ BARRETTES) (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I’m driving down to DeKalb! Dragon face on a rag-a-zine mag McMuffin early for a Big Mac I’m driving down to DeKalb! Front/back ear swab, “Matter o’ Fakk” 80,000 trillion dollars; 55 local trollops Doin’ up a few hairs Whack you off in the bath Calculator math These light bulbs break (Lite bulbs break) Order-in steak I got a garden rake I’m driving down to DeKalb Wife won’t make dinner She sits and thinks Thinks about what Thinks about what? About being on TV She’s writing a script She’s driving down to DeKalb Crank the fuckin’ breaks Go home to town You died full of cities around on your brain Now you’re driving down to DeKalb
13.
NOTHING WORKS (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) Booming chords Struck and sustained Things get stuck When you stick stuff down the drain I just think of anything as everything I just think of everything as anyway Nothing makes sense Nothing works All of those good hearts I loved so hard Turned into junkyard cars In Mars parking lots Friendly advice no wise person scorns Plucked from the eyes of kidnapped newborns They just think of everything as everything They just think of everything, endlessly Nothing makes sense Nothing works All of those people I loved so much We lost touch in the crunch All of those good hearts I loved so hard Like swans turned into barges They’re gone They’re gone They’re gone Nothing works
14.
STANDARD STUFF (BLESS U) (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) November clouds Feels like recess You wait around While I’m at the dentist Close the door Open the curtains The sun comes in Something like goodness You’re in my name You know my brain You pave my way You keep me sane Bless you, Babe! You go out for a jog Don’t get abducted When you come back I pop like a pot lid Cuz you’re my babe Just like in Bailey And just as much We Got Out Of Bailey You’re in my name You know my brain You pave my way You keep me sane Bless you, Babe!
15.
SUNDAY SATURDAY NIGHT (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I’m having a Sunday Saturday night I spent all weekend saving Lois Lane (Day of rest ‘fore I bought the champaign) I’m like a Halloween pumpkin I’m like a Billy Corgan I’m a Snapple Machine Better heady than forehead WOO!
16.
Low Faith 03:56
LOW FAITH (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) Two hours til daylight We’ll never wake up at the same time Birds swim, cockroaches fly Frenemies don’t meet each other’s eyes I made you casserole You made me wanna die Charlie Brown versus Rainbow Brite Low faith You got so low faith Some people are mean Some people are nice Some people always need Someone else’s advice Despite all, I’m just a dumb guy Never looked anyone in the eye Low faith You got so low faith
17.
MILLIONAIRE DAD (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) You’ve got a Millionaire dad A big shot Millionaire dad
18.
Simple Soul 03:04
SIMPLE SOUL (Lyrics by Porter Copyright 2021) I woke up in the gas chamber My veins burned into my eyes Down escalator; mass incinerator Scared to die by surprise I stomped the gas by accident Blew out one of my tires Blame it on the waiter Put if off til later Someday it might work right I’m a simple soul Tonight, tonight I’m a simple soul Tonight It’s alright I woke up in an icicle My eyes were just like a child’s Came an alligator Chronic innovator Reminded me it’s not all smiles Tomorrow morning it’ll be the same Flying a Lightnin’ Kite Pancake batter Voided brain matter Sunlight is just too bright I’m a simple soul Tonight, tonight I’m a simple soul Tonight It’s alright
19.

credits

released January 22, 2022

THIS LP IS A PRODUCT OF TEXAS

PORTER DID EVERYTHING AGAIN

EXCEPT:

HALES SANG BACKGROUND AND PLAYED HARMONICA ON TRACK 12

AND TRISTA ROSS ORATED TRACK 8

ALL SOUNDS COPYRIGHT 2021-2022 (NOW)

THIS ALBUM IS DEDICATED TO JOHN MADDEN

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all rights reserved

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Patrick Porter Austin, Texas

patrick porter is a mil dollar bill. this place is filled with ghosts.

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