Bachelor Pad Blue; Bent Pants & Stray Cats

by Patrick Porter

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1.	Hello 04:17	lyrics	buy track

2.	Going Home On The Train 02:04	lyrics	buy track

3.	Big Frowny Face 01:58	lyrics	buy track

4.	Zero Hole 03:23	lyrics	buy track

5.	Feed From A Holy Lite 03:36	lyrics	buy track

6.	Baby Tee Poem 01:09	lyrics	buy track

7.	No One's Ever Gonna Love Me 02:53	lyrics	buy track

8.	Tidy Peach 01:23	lyrics	buy track

9.	Fogelburg 03:49	lyrics	buy track

10.	Hard To Keep My Halo On 03:11	lyrics	buy track

11.	Lizzy Turtle Laylo 04:34	lyrics	buy track

12.	Hollywood Is A Word On A Wall 02:30	lyrics	buy track

13.	Detroit Beauty School (Tloo-Tloo) 03:31	lyrics	buy track

14.	Layover Pains (Chicago Union Station) 02:38	info	buy track
15.	Too Busy Digging A Grave 02:46	lyrics	buy track

16.	There's No Now 02:05	lyrics	buy track

17.	Dead Comedian Bee 02:55	lyrics	buy track

18.	K Counts Her Cups 04:19	lyrics	buy track

19.	National Spinster 03:41	lyrics	buy track

20.	Hoolahoop Moon 05:54	lyrics	buy track

about

This album was recorded January-May 2009, in D.S.C. Studios, Colorado.

credits

released November 18, 2009

Patrick Porter (All instruments, vocals)

license

about

Patrick Porter Austin, Texas

patrick porter is a mil dollar bill. this place is filled with ghosts.

contact / help

Contact Patrick Porter

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Track Name: Hello: HELLO

Hello, hello, hello you indie rockers, hello
I'm walking through your door
I'm making myself at home
I won't be sitting around alone, anymore

Well hello, hello, hello everybody hello
Pleased to make your acquaintance, I'm sure
We could be good friends, or we could go to war
Who knows what's in store?
ha ha ha ha

WOO!

(dedication)
Track Name: Going Home On The Train: GOING HOME ON THE TRAIN
Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009

Sitting in a coach seat
I pretended to be asleep
So no one would sit with me

(Going home on the train)

Two ex-girlfriends in one day
I'll miss you both
But sometimes it's just better
To stand on a train platform alone

(Going home on the train)

You say you have a short temper
I have a short temper, too
There must be something wrong with my brain

(Going home on the train)
Track Name: Big Frowny Face: BIG FROWNY FACE
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big, frowny face
I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big, frowny face
I don't believe in violence
I got better taste
But I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big, frowny face

I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big, frowny face
I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big, frowny face
I'm not trying to be the boss
Or to "Put her in her place"
But I'm gonna kill that girl if I stay with that girl
With the big frowny face
Track Name: Zero Hole: ZERO HOLE
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c. 2009)

Sometimes I feel like I'm already a fuckin' ghost
Sometimes I feel just like a zero hole
Sometimes I feel like I got nowhere to go
Sometimes I feel just like a zero hole
Sometimes I feel like no one wants me at all
Sometimes I feel just like a zero hole
Sometimes I feel just like a lost soul
Sometimes I feel just like a zero hole
Sometimes I feel like such so-and-so
Sometimes I feel just like a zero hole
I got nowhere to go
Track Name: Feed From A Holy Lite: FEED FROM A HOLY LITE
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

It would've been great
If it would've been right
It would've been feed off a holy lite

It would've been fine
If it wouldn't've been fight
It would've been feed off a holy lite

Got my feet on the ground
And it's cold
It's cold

It wouldn't've been dark
If it would've been bright
It would've been feed off a holy lite

It would've been god
If it would've been white
It would've been feed off a holy lite

Got my feet on the ground
And it's cold
It's cold
Track Name: Baby Tee Poem: (poem)

by Patrick Porter c. 2009
Track Name: No One's Ever Gonna Love Me: NO ONE'S EVER GONNA LOVE ME
Lyrics By Patrick Porter c.2009

I'm looking at a picture
That you took of me
Alone and all alone
Is all I'll ever be
I try to be someone
That someone else might need
But it doesn't matter
Because no one's ever gonna love me

People are there for a while
Then they go away
Even if they were someone
Who was with you everyday
It does no good to ask why
It's a mystery
All I know is
No one's ever gonna love me
Track Name: Tidy Peach: TIDY PEACH
Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009

I'm a tidy peach
On a piece of pie
I got a taste like oh oh oh!

I'll try a slice of yours
You try a slice of mine
I've been on my tray too long

Oh hello, hi,
I'm a creamy soul
I don't like to wait so long

I'm a tidy peach
On a piece of pie
How come nobody takes a bite?
Track Name: Fogelburg: FOGELBURG
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

It's hard to say
I guess I'm just not built that way
Some people make
Progress while I make mistakes

Turn me inside
Turn me outside
Turn me over and over and over

It's hard to say
I guess I'm just not made that way
Some people work
But all I wanna do is play

Turn me inside
Turn me outside
Turn me over and over and over
Track Name: Hard To Keep My Halo On: HARD TO KEEP MY HALO ON
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

I've been making it my fault
I've been kicking wide
I've been getting my wile on
Like 'they call me the breeze'
A parasite in a little flop
I'm off on a furlong
Taking leave

When I got no one
When I'm all alone
It's hard to keep my halo on

I'm out on the highway
And I'm missing a light
I'm screaming my head off
Because the driver's drunk
When I asked for directions
The guy just smiled
He said "I've been living the high life
and I'm feeling low"

When I got no one
When I'm on my own
It's hard to keep my halo on

We are adults
Out on the town
Drinking and talking
Doing our thing
Holding our beers
Just like so
We are adults
Dontcha know?
Cheers!
Track Name: Lizzy Turtle Laylo: LIZZY TURTLE LAYLO
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

I sighed so hard
I made the birds fly away
Into the hardly air
Like, "And lastly so"
A chain biting a dog
I said into the phone: "Baby"

I say Lay Lo
I say Lay Lo

Is this my hometown
Or just the end of the road
In the face of all the aims?
I drank a little one
It just made me feel dumb
I've been that way a lot lately

I say Lay Lo
I say Lay Lo

I slept on the couch
At Lizzy's house
Except I couldn't sleep at all
Everybody was gone
And I was alone
I've been that a lot lately

I say Lay Lo
I say Lay Lo
Track Name: Hollywood Is A Word On A Wall: HOLLYWOOD IS A WORD ON A WALL
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

Hollywood is a word on a wall
Hollywood in the sky
Hollywood is a man in a mall
Hollywood is nice

Holl le lay!
Holl le lay!

Hollywood is a word on a wall
Hollywood goodbye
Hollywood is a long way away
Hollywood is nice

Holl le lay!
Holl le lay!
Track Name: Detroit Beauty School (Tloo-Tloo): DETROIT BEAUTY SCHOOL (Tloo-Tloo)
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

I live in a room in the Fort Shelby
I go dancing alone in the Crystal Ballroom
I light matches and pretend I'm a Pontiac
It's always blue and silver in a landslide grave
I have a job at People's Outfitting
(In an aisle like that I'll mail you a sweet light)
Roof caving in in the Detroit Commerce Building
(Years of profitability followed by sad decline)
Our lives have suffered a happier fate
(Promised renovations yet to materialize)
Sometimes when it rains I run and shout Tloo-Tloo!

I live in a room at the Book-Cadillac
You might say that I am a Medusa
The third eye I had was ripped off by vandals
Now I sit here hoping third time's a charm
Track Name: Too Busy Digging A Grave: TOO BUSY DIGGING A GRAVE
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c. 2009)

Waiting so long
I didn't know it could take so long
I've been waiting around
Longer than I can say
Now I suppose
That I could go out and see how it goes
But don't you know
I'm too busy digging a grave

All my friends
Think they're going somewhere big
And they'll let you know
That they're on their way
But I don't know
If I even want to go because
Don't you know
I'm too busy digging a grave

Sometimes I think
About the way my life could've been
If I was someone else
Or if somehow things were changed
But it's too late
For me to even speculate because
As it is
I'm too busy digging a grave
Track Name: There's No Now: THERE'S NO NOW
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c. 2009)

There's a then
There's a there
There's a new day
In the air
But there's no
No, no
There's no
There's no now

There's a will
There's a way
There's a 'happened yesterday'
But there's no
No, no
There's no
There's no now

There's a sun
There's a moon
There's a building
There's a room
But there's no
No, no
There's no
There's no now

There's no now!

There's a way
There's a why
There's the ground and
There's the sky
But there's no
No, no
But there's no
There's no now

There's a bottle
There's a can
There's a happy,
Happy man
But there's no
No, no
There's no
There's no now

There's no now!
NOW!
(Ahhhh...........)
Track Name: Dead Comedian Bee: DEAD COMEDIAN BEE
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

Dead comedian
Left your lights on the stage
So long, so long, so long

Old comedian
Speedball
So long, so long, so long

Out on the town
Back of a car
It packs a bite

Dead comedian
Glass of water
So long, so long, so long

Old comedian
Stuck some H and some C
So long, so long, so long

Son of a bitch!
Son of a bitch!
Son of a bitch!
Track Name: K Counts Her Cups: K COUNTS HER CUPS
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c. 2009)

I'm in a safe place
I can go without a word all day
Make my next meal
A loaded gun
We're spending some time
Alone

Unpaved county road
No mail
Lonely old men write letters
To the newspaper
I live on the moon
I could be anyone
Me and my notions
We're spending some time
Alone
Track Name: National Spinster: NATIONAL SPINSTER
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

The spinster
Sits at home
Reading books
While other girls
Go to bars
And pick up men
She wrote me
And told me to
Send her a card
She loves Jesus
Judas Iscari-o
Betrayed his friend

Oh nations
Move a world
Oh nations
Hang on my word

She's a spinster
On a Friday night
Reading Psalms
I'm a bachelor
In America
Getting drunk
There are people
That fit together
Like a cord and plug
I hope someday
That all of us
Find love

Oh nations
Move a world
Oh nations
Hang on my word
Track Name: Hoolahoop Moon: HOOLAHOOP MOON
(Lyrics by Patrick Porter c.2009)

Hello
Hoolahoop Moon
It's just
Me and You

I'm lonely

Hello
Hoopahoop Moon
I just don't
Know what to do

I'm lonely

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